


A Different Approach

by wiznearbi



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Morgana, Episode: s02e03 The Nightmare Begins, F/F, Fix-It, Good morgana, Gwen being amazing (as usual), M/M, Magic Revealed, Merlin tells Morgana about his magic, Morgana teases Merlin about Arthur, Morgana tells Gwen about her magic, No druids die that day, Screw Destiny, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-01 08:10:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16280831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wiznearbi/pseuds/wiznearbi
Summary: What if things went a bit differently in The Nightmare Begins?





	1. The Nightmare Begins

**Author's Note:**

> Any resemblance to an existing fic is entirely unintentional. Chapter titles will share an episode title if they occur during the episode.

“Please, Merlin!” Morgana begged, “I just need to hear someone say it so I don't have to keep feeling like I'm imagining it!”

Merlin stayed quiet, his thoughts conflicting. He wanted to tell her, but he didn't want to disobey Gaius. If he revealed himself to her, bad things could come of it. He would be meddling with destiny, and destiny wasn't something to be meddled with. Maybe Morgana would still turn to evil, but a small part of him couldn’t help but feel that there was also the chance that she wouldn't.

Morgana stopped pleading and the desperate look in her eyes changed to one of disappointment. She shot him a small glare and backed toward the door. Merlin watched her walk away from him, a feeling of uneasiness and helplessness growing inside his chest.

_Sometimes you've got to do what you think is right, and damn the consequences._

“Morgana,” he croaked out, his gaze fixed on the floorboards. He didn't think she heard him at first, he was so quiet, but she turned to him inquisitively. He looked up at her and gulped. It was now or never, “I want to show you something.”

Morgana’s eyes hardened. “You've already shown me enough.” she said bitterly. He beckoned her close.

“Please, Morgana.” he said. She stared at him with a calculating look before slowly stepping closer to him, until they were but a few feet apart. Merlin took a deep breath and held his cupped hands in front of her. Her eyes flicked up to his in confusion

 Merlin’s eyes shone gold and he stared at his hands, not daring to look at Morgana’s face as he willed his magic to create. He opened his palms to reveal a large butterfly with beautiful azure wings. He smiled despite himself, watching the look of wonder on Morgana’s face. Her eyes - bloodshot from crying - went wide as the butterfly fluttered up from his hands and disappeared into one of Gaius’s bookshelves.

For a moment, he forgot the situation he was in, just gleeful that he could use his magic for such beautiful things, but reality crashed down onto him, and his heart began to hammer in his chest, because _oh God he just revealed his deepest secret to the ward of the King who could have him killed in an instant and is also prophesied to become an evil witch._

 But Morgana was quiet, staring at Merlin’s hands from where he'd just conjured the butterfly and shaking. A choked sob escaped her, and before he could open his mouth she'd thrown her arms around him in a crushing embrace, trembling and weeping against him.

“Merlin,” she kept gaspinf between hiccups, “Oh, Merlin, thank you. You-” she wept again, unable to make out words. Merlin held her to his chest, tears running down his own cheeks.

“You're not alone.” he told her firmly, “You're not alone.”

 After what felt like an eternity Morgana pulled back and wiped her nose on the sleeve of her nightgown. Despite all the snot and dribble, she was grinning like a child whose birthday had arrived early.  

“Sorry,” she said, apologetically, “You must think I'm pathetic, so unladylike-”

“No, not at all,” Merlin assured her, “Never that. It's all right not to be ladylike, Morgana, really.”

She looked at him then, and he felt as if her green gaze pierced his very soul. “Despite me being the King’s ward you still trusted me with this. Uther could have you killed.” Her strong, authoritative tone was slowly returning to her voice. Merlin smiled shyly.

 “I-I couldn't bear seeing you so helpless, knowing there was a way I could help.” he admitted, scratching his neck awkwardly.

Morgana had pure gratitude written all over her features. “Thank you, Merlin.” she told him, with all the sincerity she could muster.

 They stood there for a while, the Warlock and the Witch, and Merlin could almost feel destiny changing its course. Morgana was his friend, one of his best friends, and friendship came before destiny. How could he have doubted this before?

 “Did you know magic, before you came here?” she asked. Merlin chuckled.

“Well...not really. I didn't know any spells before I met Gaius. My magic was more...what's the word? An instinct before that. I could move objects and things like that since I was born. Didn't need to talk or anything.” he explained. Morgana gaped at him.

“You were born with magic?” she asked incredulously, “But I thought-”

“That magic needed to be learned?” he finished for her, “It does for normal sorcerers, but for you and I - your magic earlier was instinct too - it's a part of our very being. I'm a Warlock, and you're a Witch.”

“A witch…” Morgana repeated, looking down at her feet, her brow furrowed, “I'm a witch.”

“Yes,” Merlin said nervously, uncertain of what she would make of this new information. To his relief, the corners of her mouth turned upwards and her face broke into a joyful smile as if everything was right with the world.

“There's a word for what I am!” she said excitedly, “There's a word…” her hands shot up to fumble with her jewelled necklace and she turned away from him for a moment, staring ahead of her at nothing in deep thought. Her eyes suddenly shot up to meet Merlin’s again.

 “There's others like me.” she breathed.

 “You're not alone.” Merlin repeated from earlier, “I promise you Morgana, I will help you.”

 Morgana strode up to him and put a hand on his arm.

 “I would like nothing better.” she smiled, "Now, if you don't mind, tell me everything."


	2. Repercussions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merlin faces Gaius and Kilgharrah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shit's about to go down (with Kilgharrah, at least)

“Does Arthur know?” Morgana asks him one day, as she pops into Gaius’s chambers to get her sleeping draught while Gaius was out somewhere. It still doesn’t help, but she is less troubled by the nightmares now that she knows the cause.

Merlin looks up sharply at her. “No,” he answered quietly, “No he does not.” He turns back to the book he was reading, aware of Morgana’s piercing gaze on his back.

“Well, why not?” she asked, “I don’t judge, I just want to know. It must be horrible, having to hide such an important part of yourself from your...best friend.”

“Oh it is, believe me.” he agrees, “There are so many times where I feel that...he should know. Times where he seems to accept magic, you know?” he sighs, “But it never feels like the right time.”

“I’d like to tell him about myself too,” Morgana confesses, diverting her gaze to the window, “He and I grew up together, Arthur’s like a brother to me.” she makes a face, “Don’t tell him I said that.”

Merlin laughs, “I won’t!” 

She continues. “He’s not like the King, that much I know. Perhaps he takes after his mother. But he’s still grown up around Uther, poor thing's had those anti-magic thoughts drilled into his head from the day he was born, he’s bound to think the same way his father does to a degree. But you, Merlin, I’ve seen the way he values your counsel, how he values you. I have a feeling you can change him.”

“You too, Morgana.” Merlin says earnestly, giving her a small lopsided smile, “I know for a fact he thinks of you as a sister too, No matter how much he denies it.”

Morgana smiles back at him sadly. “Uther’s so controlling, you know.” her grip around her vial containing the sleeping draught tightens, “You’d think he wants Arthur to be another, younger version of himself rather than Arthur, it’s horrible. I’ve hardly ever seen them fight, and it’s mainly because Uther tolerates no arguments against him and Arthur values his father’s pride above his own.”

Merlin nodded in understanding. “Have you spoken to Gwen about this? She’s your best friend, and she’s very sweet. I doubt she bears magic as a whole any ill will, and even if she does I’m sure she’d understand..”

Morgana looked lost in thought for a second. “Perhaps I will, but only if you do. She’s your friend too, you know” she grinned at him, “I’ll see you later, perhaps, Merlin. Give that dragon of yours my regards! And thank you for those flowers!”

 Merlin let out a forced laugh and leaned back in his chair to give her a small wave as she left. His happy expression immediately dropped after she shut the door.

 “Oh dear,” he muttered raking his fingers through his hair, “That cryptic old beast is going to be _furious_ with me.”

* * *

 “You did what?” The dragon roared in fury as Merlin winced but held his ground.

 “She’s my friend!” Merlin cried back at him, unafraid, “It is my duty to help her!”

 “Your duty is to protect the Once and Future King!” The dragon growled, staring down at Merlin with a dangerous look, “You cannot do that by helping the Witch!”

 “Her name is Morgana!” Merlin yelled. He was so _sick_ of the dragon and destiny at this point. He could understand how it felt; being shackled for 20 years in the dark of this cave, no one to touch him, no one to talk to him, the last of his kind, but he could not let the great creature influence his decisions in this way anymore. Merlin was sick and tired of feeling like a monster.

“Killing her,” Merlin continued, as the dragon reeled back just a bit from being spoken to in such a way, “Is not the only way to change what she could become. I will not kill her, nor will I keep my secret from her when I can use it to help her understand.” he turned to leave, but stopped for a second to say, “And I will do the same with Mordred.”

With that, he leapt up the steps, the flames of his torch swaying with the wind and lighting his way. He could hear the dragon roaring in his mind ( _“Merlin, Merlin!”_ ) but he was too damn tired to listen.

* * *

 “You told her about your magic?” Gaius asked Merlin incredulously after he’d returned from a council meeting, “Merlin, I told you not to!”

Merlin spun around to face him. “I know, Gaius!” he sighed, “But she was so happy to find out she wasn’t alone! I can help her, she won’t go down the wrong path if I guide her the right way!”

“Merlin-”

“Like you did with me!” Merlin added, hoping the comparison to himself, as well as his puppy-dog eyes, would sway his mentor. Gaius went quiet, looking down at his feet for a moment, and sighed.

“When was this?” he asked.

“Last night?” Merlin replied sheepishly, “She came in here all scared and told me she thought she had magic, and then I showed her a spell. She was really grateful, Gaius!” he grinned.

Gaius gave him the eyebrow. Merlin’s grin turned more into a grimace.

“I only hope you don’t come to regret this decision, my boy,” Gaius said, finally, giving him a pointed look, before walking over to his table. Merlin’s expression drooped.

“I hope so too.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The reason why I didn't refer to Kilgharrah by his name was because I'm pretty sure Merlin never finds out what his name is until The Last Dragonlord.


	3. Let's talk about Arthur

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter with implied Merthur

Merlin stood for a moment before quietly tapping his knuckles against Morgana’s door. He hoped he wasn’t disturbing her.

He heard a rustling inside and then footsteps growing louder until the door creaked open to reveal Morgana in one of her favourite green dresses, her hair done up and looking elegant as always. She smiled brightly upon seeing him.

“Merlin! What a pleasant surprise!” she said, “Come in, Come in!” She beckoned him inside and closed the door.

 “So, I was thinking about getting the druids to help you…” Merlin started. Morgana looked surprised at this, her lips slightly parted as if about to say something. “But Gaius told me that if you left the castle at this time Uther will think you were kidnapped,” he explained. 

“And that would put the druids in danger.” Morgana nodded, “I understand.”

Merlin cleared his throat nervously. “I know I’m not as experienced with magic as they are, but I understand what it’s like. I’ve talked to Gaius, he’s agreed to help me help you.”

Morgana sighed in relief. “That would be most wonderful, thank you. Perhaps you could help me when I come to take my sleeping draught?”

“Of course. Oh, and another thing…” Merlin grimaced, “I have a feeling Arthur thinks we’re courting or something. He...may have caught me bringing you flowers the other day.”

Morgana gaped at him for a moment, before breaking down into a fit of laughter. Merlin went beet red and scowled.

“It’s not funny!”

“Oh, it is, Merlin!” Morgana snorted, “It really, really is! Oh dear, is he jealous?”

“Why would he be _jealous_?”

 _"Why would-”_ Morgana stopped giggling, and stared at him like he’d grown another head, “You don’t know, do you?”

All right, now he was confused. “Know what?”

She smirked at him with a twinkle in her eye. “You’ll see,” she said, slyly, and pushed him out the door.

 “See _what_ ?” He asked, indignantly. The door shut in his face. He could _still_ hear her damned laughter inside.

“You’ll see!” her muffled voice repeated, the glee evident in her tone. Merlin could only sigh in defeat and turn to go back down the stairs from her chambers, trying to fight the amused grin on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tfw ur dumbass friend's half-sister knows your darkest secret and maybe something else, but you're also a dumbass and don't know what it is


	4. Lancelot and Guinevere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gwen is missing and Morgana isn't about to sit here waiting for her.

"Of course I'm going after her. What do you take me for? I couldn't disagree with Father in public."

Morgana's expression hardens and she straightens her back. "I'm coming with you," she says, and she hopes, _she hopes_ , that Arthur will understand.

But Arthur just sighs and looks away, and Morgana isn't sure he does.

"I can't let you do that."

"And why not?" Morgana raises her voice and she glares at him. He doesn't cower back as others do, he stares right back her with...is that _pity_ in his eyes?

"Morgana, I know how much you care about Guinevere. Believe me, I understand," he tells her gently, or as gently as Arthur Pendragon can manage around her, "But if we both disappear, Father will be furious. You know he will."

"We went to save Ealdor for Merlin that one time." Morgana protests.

"Are you forgetting how angry he was after that?" Arthur asks her, and she can tell his eyes are begging her to _just stop_ , but when has she ever listened to him? 

"Of course, I do. But I don't care about him, this is Gwen we're talking about." 

"Morgana, I know she's your friend-"

"She's more than just my friend!" 

Arthur goes quiet at that, and she wants to scream because _can he stop looking so pitiful she's sick of it_

"I understand that too. Morgana, I promise we'll bring her home," he tells her firmly, and she knows that means he has put an end to the matter as he walks out, no doubt to find Merlin who'll be tagging along.

But that doesn't mean she has.

* * *

 

She sneaks out after them that night, and she sees Merlin's trick with the barrels. Sneaky little git, those guards are probably going to complain to Uther about that later. 

It is as they are riding through the woods - Merlin almost falling off his saddle with the weariness of sleep-deprivation - when Morgana catches up with them, taking them by surprise.

"Oh, hello," she says cheerfully, but there is an edge in her voice that Arthur surely recognises. He brings his horse to a stop and stares at her, his mouth hanging open. Merlin gives her a half-hearted wave from behind him. Morgana tries to smile back at him, but all she can manage is a grimace. 

"Morgana?" Arthur asks in disbelief.

"No, Arthur. It's me, Guinevere." she tells him flatly, "Of course it's 'Morgana', you git. Did you really think you were going to stop me from helping you find my best friend?"

"What are you doing here?" 

"Did I not already make that clear?"

Arthur groans. "Honestly, Morgana, do you ever listen?"

"Sorry. No, I don't." she nudges her horse closer to them, "Seeing as we have the same goal, mind if I join you?"

"I do, actually. You are going straight to Camelot, and Merlin and I are rescuing Guinevere," Arthur orders her as he continues walking ahead. She waits for him to pass her before lining herself with Merlin and following him. 

"No," she tells him, and she is pleased to hear him sigh with exasperation and his shoulders tense in agitation as he continues forward without a word. They ride in peace like this for a few minutes before Morgana speaks up.

"Merlin's fallen asleep."

She can't see Arthur's face, but she knows he just rolled his eyes. "Of course he did," he says, and there is a hint of fondness in his voice. 

* * *

Later - when Arthur (being the huge prat that he is) has somehow convinced both Merlin and Morgana to smear Gaia berries all over themselves and walk straight into a Wilddeoren tunnel - they stop at a stream. The disgusting smush on Morgana's face takes more than a little water to wash off completely, but she's grateful for the chance to cool off. Merlin and Arthur are standing by her, bickering as usual. She listens in (she can't help it, they're the only people around for miles and she's bored) and almost snorts when Arthur actually says he's _sorry_. She's never seen him like this, and she's known him for years. 

"Well, they do say love makes you do strange things." 

She freezes. Is this the moment?

"What are you talking about?" Arthur asks him incredulously. 

"Why can't you just admit your feelings for Gwen?"

Oh. _Oh._ Oh no.

Arthur only scoffs in response to Merlin, but Merlin persists. 

"Is it really that hard to admit you like her? Just say it!" 

"I can't!"

Morgana chooses that moment to butt into the conversation, trying to ignore the weird feeling inside of her. For some reason, she does not want Arthur to say he likes Gwen, and it's not just for Merlin's sake. "What's this about Gwen?"

"Arthur likes her!" Merlin says, grinning boyishly. Arthur rolls his eyes. 

"I do _not_!" 

"I sure hope you don't." Morgana says, "She's too good for you." Arthur gives her a look that says 'really?'

"Anyone would be honoured to be fancied by me, Morgana," he tells her haughtily. _Like Merlin_ , Morgana thinks. 

She flicks her hair and turns away from them, but not fast enough to miss Merlin shooting her a searching look.

* * *

Gwen was with Lancelot, tied back-to-back against each other with their hands intertwined. It was evident they knew they were going to die and it made Morgana's heart break to think about all the trauma Gwen had gone through already in her life. She'd come so close to dying more than once, and this time it was Morgana's fault.

Morgana thanked whatever Gods were listening for the perfect timing as she jumped into the cage containing the former knight and her best friend. Gwen cried out Morgana's name in relief as Arthur freed the two and they stood up. Morgana quickly hugged Gwen and pulled her behind them so she, Arthur and Lancelot - who now held a sword in his hand - fended off the large (and ugly) Wilddeoren. 

Her ears were ringing, but she could distinctly hear Arthur asking Lancelot what he was doing here. 

"I came to save Gwen. What about you?"

"Likewise."

A small, selfish part of her couldn't help but wish he wasn't here, but she shut that part out as the chandelier came crashing down (no doubt the work of Merlin). 

The next few seconds were a blur. She heard Arthur yell Merlin's name, and within moments Merlin had jumped over the bars and joined them as they circled the cage and scrambled into the tunnel from which the Wilddeoren emerged only minutes ago. Arthur and Gwen were pushed back as Merlin and Lancelot stayed at the entrance, Lancelot with his sword drawn. 

"Take Guinevere!" he called to Arthur, "I'll hold them off!"

"No!" Gwen cried and she attempted to run over to him, but Arthur (bless him) coerced her into following him, and they ran down through the tunnel and out of sight. Lancelot turned back and Morgana, her own blade at the ready, joined him.

"I'll help you," she told him, and he glanced at her. He looked surprised for a moment, but blinked in acceptance and turned back to Hengist, who was ferociously slashing at the Wilddeoren. Merlin decided to take matters into his own hands, and he muttered a spell that caused the gate to slam down, trapping the bloodthirsty mountain of a man inside the cage and condemning him to his fate. Lancelot gave Merlin a look that Morgana could not decipher.

"I see you're still up to your old tricks, Merlin."

Merlin tilted his head in that very Merlin way of his and replied, "It's probably best you don't tell anyone about that."

It was then, at that moment, that Lancelot seemed to remember she was there and his gaze landed onto her. Shoulders suddenly tensed, eyes wide open in alarm, he stuttered, "M-my Lady-

"Don't worry," she assured him, "He's already told me." And she couldn't thank him enough for it.

* * *

When they returned to Camelot, Morgana took Gwen up to her chambers and helped her change into more comfortable clothes. Gwen stepped out from behind the changing screen wearing her lavender dress, her arms wrapped around the dirty blue gown of Morgana's which she'd worn during her time in Hengist's fortress.

"I should wash this, my lady," Gwen says quietly, and Morgana stares at her in disbelief.

"No, no, don't bother. Not tonight," she tells her, shaking her head. Gwen opens her mouth to protest but Morgana cuts her off, "I'll be fine for tonight. You've been through so much, Guinevere, you need rest. Please." She gently touches Gwen's wrists and the other woman's face immediately softens. 

"Fine," she sighs in resignation, and walks past Morgana to the door, "Thank you for doing this, Morgana."

"No need to thank me, Gwen," Morgana smiles, "If you ever want to talk about what happened...I'll be here for you."

Gwen looks up at her again and returns the smile. "I know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In other words, dagger lesbian sets out to save her floral gf and lancelot knows

**Author's Note:**

> Merlin out here being the real MVP


End file.
